Thursday, May 16, 2013

Wow, April (and also May)

Sorry for the extended writing absence. Even now I should be doing research and not writing but I'm sort of exhausted and my brain is in over-drive so here I am. A LOT has been going on. (And I started writing this post weeks ago and of course didn't finish so forgive the back tracking and then rambling as well.)

There's this horoscope website, Astrology Zone. I heard about it from, initially in an article about the astrology website itself (apparently it's big amongst celebs? I didn't read the linked New York article in that post that would explain it), and then in a short post I was reading over there about going to it for guidance when things got confusing.

I understood the author's sentiment. Even as a mostly logical, rational person, I indulge in my horoscope. I read every Tuesday when it ends up in my in box and know about my sign. I get that this can be seen as is silly. But even though I'm not big on religion of the organized variety, sometimes having some sort of sign post can be helpful and this is what I choose as my sign post.

I don't imbue it with any sort of big importance and mostly keep this to myself, lest I ruin my legal brain reputation, but there it is.

I mention all that as way of background for why, when I was trying to parse out my feelings about something, I remembered's reference to AstrologyZone and decided to give it a whirl. I opened it up and read the lengthy analysis for how the month of April was going to pan out for me, a cancer. And it was all really freaking positive. And it all sort of came true. And now I will never be able to read AstrologyZone again because I will think that whatever it says will have some effect on my life, good or bad, and I don't want to know. (Except I am human and curious/weak so will undoubtably read it again, even knowing not every month can be magical/right on point and really only has as much effect as stock I put into it.)

My April horoscope began thusly:

You have just arrived at your most important month of 2013 for professional progress and affairs, and if you play your cards right, you should see a major breakthrough in the weeks ahead...if you begin interviewing or pitching now, you have the best new moon of the year to help you.

I think when I saw that I had just finished applying to one position and took the astrological saying to mean I should apply to a few more. Of which I applied to one more because I am a horribly lazy, easily distracted person.

But that one was all I really needed. 2 interviews in the middle of the state and I am moving to the Central Valley, working in the county counsel's office somewhere down there. (Sorry for vague, but, ya know, government work! Small town! Certain amount of anonymity needed.)

I am excited about this. Truly. I've been bitching far too long about living in SF without really doing anything about it. I know the snobby SF dwellers are like, "Ugh, not SF, how can you possibly?" I don't entirely blame you. I can be snobby about living here as well. I have never been to a Subway. Ever. Why would I when SubCenter is near my house? I mock people who go to Applebee's and even my own friend writes somewhat mocking posts about chain restaurant food because we are elitist jerks who can pay for $11 salads steps from our law school. 

But here's the thing: I actually do well in smaller towns. I'm less overwhelmed. I like heat. A lot. I was way way skinnier in Louisiana and that was partly because I so enjoyed being outside, sweating from the midsummer heat. The place I'm moving to has a cute main street and I've had some pretty good meals there and I'm excited to actually be DOING legal work. And legal work that I think fits my personality. Everyone I've met there so far seems smart and sharp and I'm truly excited, if not slightly (completely) overwhelmed by the logistics of moving in 2 weeks (!!!!) at the moment.

That same horoscope mentioned my love life and the positives there, to which I just scoffed because, man, could I be more single?

On April 25, the full moon, lunar eclipse in Scorpio 7 degrees, will light your house of true love and put the spotlight on the person you've been dating, or a pregnancy or child you have now. These matters come under your fifth house.

Lol wut? Again, I don't put much stock in this, it's more for fun and to ease my sometimes completely unquiet mind. But it wasn't wrong. Which was weird. So now I'm in a relationship which is completely unexpected and awesome and totally out of left field and ridiculously complicated because of course it is. Without getting too mushy because me, I feel a little like I'm in a Jane Austen novel. Emma in particular. Like, oh, that guy you've known forever may be completely perfect for you, even if you're completely imperfect. Huh. Who knew? It's amazing what you can figure out with lots of alcohol and late night gchats. So yeah. That happened too.

This also happened. Which was not unexpected and please, no condolences because truly, it was for the best. Good long life, good man, all those fantastic things. But it has not been without the stress of the rest of the family freaking out as they cope with their feelings. My dad and I are incredibly pragmatic about death and so when he called me I was in the middle of watching the Caps game 2. (I'm probably more devastated by my hockey team's early post season exist than by death because my emotion chip is broken.) My dad asks me, "What are you doing?" I say, "Watching the end of the Caps game." "Well, your grandpa won't find out how it ends." To which I sort of chuckle and say, "Ohhhh." 

Earlier that same day we had been discussing my grandfathers imminent demise via text and my grandpa's wife not dealing well and so I sent him the "I'm not dead yet!" song and the "He's only mostly dead!" As my dad and I are talking I say, "Well. I guess the "not dead yet" doesn't apply anymore." To which my dad retorts, "He's still only mostly dead!" Me, "You sure? You gonna go through his pockets for change? Maybe make a nice MLT sandwich?" At which point my dad has to excuse himself from the room he is in while on the phone with me saying, "Great. Now I'm gonna get in trouble for laughing at this MOST IMPORTANT time. I'm mourning my father! (laughs)" 

So. If you ever want to know how I deal with death...highly inappropriately seems to be the answer.

Right now I'm trying to finish up a research project at work, go to my grandfather's memorial tomorrow in BFE nowhere, throw a small-ish BBQ on Saturday, have the aforementioned perfect guy visit for a few days, sneak in a last couple giants games, find a place to live in the Central Valley, and then pack up and move ALL my shit there. Nothing major. /grabs a drink

No comments:

Post a Comment